I'm Hungry

Mainly because i can't sleep, i kinda realize this a while back, whenever i sleep really late, almost in the morning, i will feel some kind of hunger, which automatically makes me look for food, but i actually already ate, in fact, i did look for food just a couple of hours, can't believe i ate chocolate, for the longest time i've been staying away from chocolate, it comes to me in this dark night, but seriously though, i tried to sleep early, like lots of time, but i can't seem to sleep, even when i turned of my computer, i got my phone by my side, then realizing surfing on my phone is annoying because it's slow automatically makes me wanna turn on my computer.

I really wish my writing means more than just for me, don't get me wrong, i started writing because, err what was the reason again? actually i don't recall, yeah, but now after reading so many articles from many websites, i wish i could be one of them, the one writing those articles, yeah.. i've had some ideas, but don't think that it would be coming out soon very much enough, mostly the feeling of scared, i'm not a risk taker i'll admit that, but i believe, doesn't seem convincing does it.

Just a late night blogging, can't find anything interesting on the internet, youtube seems to be dull right now, all my subscription - Watched!

Anyway, i think youtube is like my third generation of television, it used to be astro as the first generation, and then i evolve into internet, but wasn't into youtube back then, after a while, after having a proper internet that could load youtube videos really fast, i finally get the hang of subscribing, i used to thought that having to subscribe to other people channels meaning you have to pay, and the fact is that i just found out recently, well not like just now, but couple of years ago, actually, maybe few months ago, after KevJumba, then i really get the hang of subscribing to other people channels, ironically not a lot of people subscribe to me, well that's a terrible joke, cause i'm not a vlogger, actually i don't have to be a vlogger, i could just make skits, but that would require me to actually act, the truth is.. i don't know how to act.

Ironically, i always imaging when i was a kid that i would be in a scene, nah.. hopeless child shenanigans, but now it's a bit easier, a bit, not a lot, i mean sure you don't have to act for a television, i mean youtube is pretty good enough, i bet there's more people watching youtube more than they watch television, but the truth is, television is still mainstream, and youtube is.. only when people have proper connection.. you see my point.

Not that i haven't tried the vlogging thing, aargh.. saying this just makes me frustrated, i can't even lift myself up, yeah, i'm having doubts, but i'm getting better, i'll get there in a while, i did it with my presentation, not the best, but i'm getting better, i'm getting good, i probably even start a trend, before i actually present properly, people were like reading off the projectors which seems kinda boring, but i was more shallow compare to them before, but then i decided to change, i need to change, it's for the benefit for me in the future anyway, so then i started presenting properly, not being scared and all, and i have to say, it kinda payed off, i'm not scared anymore when i'm presenting, i'm not shaking, and i'm actually talking in front of the class, and for all of my presentation that i did this year, i haven't heard from a single lecturer that asked me to speak up, cause before the fifth semester, lecturer always asking my to speak up, see i'm.. err what's the word, generating? no, i'm evolving?, something better, i'm progressing, yeah..

Wow.. late night blog, well i'm just.. err.. yeah i guess that's just much about it, i still wanna eat? don't think my parents approve of me eating instant noodles in 3 in the morning.

Oh yeah, that reminds me, i have a doctor appointment tomorrow, in 9 in the morning? i still can't sleep, oh why can't i sleep in this hollow place? should i continue? i shouldn't, i should probably sleep, maybe i need to take a pill or something, i remember when i was sick and my mom make me eat medicine and that i would fall asleep right away, maybe i should fake being sick in order to get medicine so i could finally fall asleep without trying, cause i'm err..

okay i'm done, trying to sleep here people, which doesn't explain why i'm still typing, okay STOP!