Something To Say

Still can't say it enough.. It's Over, okay last time, seriously .. It's OVER....

Sadly it's not the end, it might be the end, but later on, it's the beginning of something, i guess that's the funny thing about life, when another things end, another one begins, just like life, when an old person dies, a new baby is born, i guess that's the simplest thought i could make..

But seriously though, i seriously don't have anything to do.. so i'll make a list of thing i hope i can do without holding on to them...
- finally clean up my room and making it spotless
- do something meaningful and useful in my life, lately i feel useless.. yeah it's not just a feeling..
- money seems to be the question, i wonder where i can get my hands on those.. still don't wanna be a money freak, but can't help it, need to buy stuff. I wish there's another thing to use to buy stuff instead of money, wait didn't they had that already? it's called credit card.. oh yeah, but you still need money to pay your credit card dumb ass... yeah but it's not straight from your wallet money.. Nevermind...
- just bought new strings for my acoustic guitar, only thing is that, it sucks, the strings are friggin hard, i can barely play a chord properly....
- Piano, i'm not getting better, but i am doing something different, trying to make songs that isn't great, still need to work on my melodies, and write a lyric.... still can't sing though, guess i'll just whistle for now....
- buy some stuff, i know that i blew a thousand bucks for six months, but i still need storage, and i'm gonna buy a bigger one, 2TB, woohoo, try that in a depressing way... still friggin expensive, but i think it would be worth, think of all the movies you can store..

What i've been doing with my life lately.. okay let's see..
On saturday, that's the day i came back, oh yeah, i haven't done anything to say anything bout that trip, i don't know if it's important, but because of the desire to save money by buying a cheap ticket, i almost miss my flight, here how the story goes..

Saturday mornin'
Woke up at 6, took a bath, brush my teeth, same old same old.. put on my clothes.. packed up my remaining stuff, brought all my bags to a lower floor, and it's friggin heavy not to mention..
waited around for friends to go down together, but took so friggin long i decided to go by myself, cause i was scared that i would miss my bus, plainly i hate waiting, and in that bus, it was already packed... with people and luggage.
Arrived at the bus terminal around 7.30 am, looked around see no sign of bus, went to the counter to check the bus ticket to see what bus i'm on, a little later, other people arrive, turns out they we're on the other bus, i was alone, and friggin alone, i was the only one in my class in that bus, i didn't know anyone... the bus took off a little bit later than expected... all hopes and dreams beginning to shatter...

The other bus that was filled with my class mate had already gone, and i'm still in the bus looking down on the people trying to fix the bus, still feeling down at that moment... shortly after we began taking off, shortly after, the air conditioning broke, what the hell, we haven't even start to the gravel road yet... depressed, but still had a little bit hope...
But there was the roof, it was opened so the air would come in, there's a bit cold, and i'm fine with that, as long as i can breathe, i can't complain...

In Bintulu after several hours without air conditioning, hoping for them not to change the bus, but they did, stupid move.. the bus had air conditioning, but it's not working properly, and it's friggin old, there's dust particle all over the bus, thankfully i can still breathe...

Though there was working air conditioning, but the bus was, thinking of a word for sucky.. i think i'm just gonna use terrible.. The bus was terrible, cause every it slows down, the engine won't start... till one point, the bus had to move on it self to start the engine, cause we can't push the bus like a car, so the bus just move forward like a car being pushed...

But the sucky thing bout it is that, even though the driver know the bus is a failure to use, he still stops at Batu Niah, which is a stopping location for passengers to piss and eat.. okay not at the same time cause it would be weird if you're peeing while you're eating, actually it sounds gross..

yeah, so we're stuck there for an hour and a half, and that was the time all my hopes was broken to a million pieces, at that time it was 4.30 pm, and my flight was at 8.20, and there's a 2 hour check in time.. so i was feeling a little worried, i nearly gave up, cause there's nothing else i could do, even if there was a bus that arrive.. i didn't think i would make it, cause i would take 2 hours to get to Miri.. then nearly at 5, there was a bus, so a little of my hope lived again.. but it wasn't big to hope for, the worst of it was probably, thinking that i won't probably make it home, won't see my parents on that night, my parents would probably be devastated that i missed my flight..

Long story short, i made it, i arrived at the airport 7.10 PM, so i really had to thank god alot for letting me go home on that day, even though it was hard, and i gave up hope.. faith is still there for me, i'm making this all mushy so that i could remember what a terrible day i had and at the end, i made it...

well that's one hell of a trip, suspense, feeling crappy, sweating, loneliness, the whole nine yards..
yeah i'm running out of words to say..